On 18 May 2022, Taylor Swift graced the stage at New York University, where she was honored with an honorary Doctor of Fine Arts degree. During this momentous occasion, she also delivered an inspiring commencement address to the graduating class of 2022.
In this video, Swift gave a humorous and inspiring 23-minute speech. While she did not feel she was qualified to tell people what to do, she shared “life hacks” she wish she knew when she was starting out her dreams of a career, and navigating life, love, pressure, choices, shame, hope and friendship. These life hacks include:
- Catch and Release
- Live Alongside Cringe
- Not Hiding Your Enthusiasm
- The Evolution of Creativity (through Writing)
- Resilience Through Criticism and Public Scrutiny
- Mistakes as Catalysts for Growth
1. Catch and Release (13:00)
Life can be heavy, especially if you try to carry it all at once. Part of growing up and moving into new chapters of your life is about catch and release.
- You have to make a choice on what things to keep, and what things to release.
- Examples of things to release:
- all grudges;
- all updates on your ex;
- all enviable promotions your school bully got at the hedge fund his uncle started.
- Examples of things to release:
- After deciding what is yours to hold and let the rest go.
- Often times the good things in your life are lighter anyway, so there’s more room for them.
- Example: One toxic relationship can outweigh so many wonderful, simple joys.
2. Live Alongside Cringe (14:05)
Cringe is unavoidable over a lifetime.
- No matter how hard you try to avoid being cringe, you will look back on your life and cringe retrospectively.
- Example: I had a phase where, for the entirety of 2012, I dressed like a 1950s housewife.
- But I was having fun. Trends and phases are fun. Looking back and laughing is fun.
3. Not Hiding Your Enthusiasm (15:16)
There is a false stigma around eagerness: it’s not cool to “want it”.
But, people who don’t try hard are fundamentally more chic than people who do.
- Effortlessness is a myth.
- Example:
- The people who wanted it the least were the ones I wanted to date and be friends with in high school.
- The people who want it most are the people I now hire to work for my company.
4. The Evolution of Creativity (through Writing)
I started writing songs when I was twelve. Since then, writing has been guiding my life. (16:33)
- Everything I do is just an extension of my writing:
- directing videos or a short film;
- creating the visuals for a tour;
- standing on stage performing.
Editing provides the thrill of working through ideas and narrowing them down and polishing it all up in the end. (16:59)
- Waking up in the middle of the night and throwing out the old idea because you just thought of a newer, better one.
- Sometimes a string of words just ensnares me and I can’t focus on anything until it’s been recorded or written down.
As a songwriter I’ve never been able to sit still, or stay in one creative place for too long. (17:30)
- While making my 11 albums, I’ve switched genres from country to pop to alternative to folk.
- We are all writers. We just write in a different voice for different situations.
- Examples:
- You write differently in your Instagram stories than you do your senior thesis.
- You send a different type of email to your boss than you do your best friend from home.
- We are all literary chameleons and I think it’s fascinating.
- It’s just a continuation of the idea that we are so many things, all the time.
- Examples:
5. Resilience Through Criticism and Public Scrutiny
I got my share of unsolicited advice as a person who started my very public career at the age of 15. (18:48)
- I was constantly being issued warnings from older members of the music industry, the media, interviewers, executives.
- This advice often presented itself as thinly veiled warnings.
- At the time, our society was absolutely obsessed with the idea of having perfect young female role models.
- Example:
- It felt like every interview I did included slight barbs by the interviewer about me one day ‘running off the rails.’
- If I didn’t make any mistakes, all the children of America would grow up to be perfect angels.
- Example:
This has not been my experience. My experience has been that my mistakes led to the best things in my life. (20:42)
- Being embarrassed when you mess up is part of the human experience.
- Getting back up, dusting yourself off and seeing who still wants to hang out with you afterward and laugh about it? That’s a gift.
- The times I was told no or wasn’t included, wasn’t chosen, didn’t win, didn’t make the cut…looking back, it really feels like those moments were as important, if not more crucial, than the moments I was told ‘yes.’
- Example:
- Not being invited to the parties and sleepovers in my hometown → felt hopelessly lonely → wrote the songs that would get me a ticket somewhere else.
- Label executives in Nashville told me that only 35-year-old housewives would listen to country music and there was no place for a 13-year-old on their roster → made me cry in the car on the way home → posted songs on MySpace and connected with teenagers who also loved country music.
- Journalists wrote in-depth, oftentimes critical, pieces about who they perceived me to be → made me feel like I was living in some weird simulation → but also made me look inward to learn about who I actually am.
- Having the world treat my love life like a spectator sport in which I lose every single game → not a great way to date in my teens and twenties → taught me to protect my private life fiercely.
- Being publicly humiliated over and over again at a young age → excruciatingly painful → forced me to devalue the ridiculous notion of social relevance and likability.
- Getting canceled on the internet and nearly losing my career → gave me an excellent knowledge of all the types of wine. 😊
- Example:
6. Mistakes as Catalysts for Growth
In your life, you will inevitably misspeak. (23:31)
- Example: trust the wrong people, under-react, overreact, hurt the people who didn’t deserve it, overthink, not think at all, self sabotage, create a reality where only your experience exists, ruin perfectly good moments for yourself and others, deny any wrongdoing, not take the steps to make it right, feel very guilty, let the guilt eat at you, hit rock bottom, finally address the pain you caused, try to do better next time, etc.
Mistakes will cause you to lose things. But losing things doesn’t just mean losing. (24:49)
- A lot of the time, when we lose things, we gain things too.
- Hard things will happen to us. We will recover. We will learn from it. We will grow more resilient because of it.